


warmth

by roboticdisposition



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Feelings, Kissing, M/M, alex loves james but its a slow process, first time ive written anything under 3k everyone be proud fsjffsklfs, i woke up at 5am and this happened, its just me in my soft hours, its quite like a hazy fic, oh no idk what this is lol, u know those like dream like fics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-12-26 17:23:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18286835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roboticdisposition/pseuds/roboticdisposition
Summary: Their lips touched, it wasn’t flames but it was warmth, it was sitting at a campfire in the winter, it was getting home when the heating was already on, it was heat and bodies and something similar to love.





	warmth

**Author's Note:**

> hey so im gonna be honest idk what this is lol its just me in my feelings and projecting it onto james n alex so yeah fkslff;s
> 
> also sorry ive not posted in a while i have big scary EXAMS next week and through the next two months so do excuse me if i disappear off the face of the earth for a while
> 
> also i made a big mistake and stuck giant pointy nails on my hands and now i am struggling to type fjslfflks so again that and my exams are to blame for lack of updates
> 
> anyway hope ur all good and u enjoy whatever the fuck this is i just wanted to explain myself xx

Alex wanted more, it was like an itch he couldn’t scratch. James was by his side, drunk and falling asleep, he looked good there, like he was part of the furniture. Alex didn’t know what he wanted, but it crept up on him, something tugging at his chest, something unsettling and demanding, he wanted something more.

He liked him, really fucking liked him. James made him feel like his insides were jellified, all gooey and mushy - like he had a schoolboy crush all over again. It overwhelmed him, at first, and then it didn’t. He liked him. He was all golden around the edges, steady and warm. Alex wanted more.

They’d been fucking for a couple of weeks now, it could’ve been longer but Alex lost count. It was a haze of sex and warmth and realisations and Alex loved it, every second of it. But he wanted more.

It wasn’t like it wasn’t enough, it was that everything still felt a little out of his reach. He wanted to kiss him without it leading to slicked fingers, he wanted to sleep next to him without excuses, he wanted more.

He didn’t know how to tell him. It all felt so delicate, so untouched and new, Alex didn’t want to disturb it. He didn’t want what they already had to crumble, but the thought was always there, pressing and demanding. It scared him, but electrified him with something hopeful, his head spinning as he looked over at James.

The eyes on him made James stir, groggy and grumbly as he straightened his neck, “Oh, sorry, didn’t mean to sleep - did you want me to leave?”

Alex felt his cheeks flush, his insides burn with a soft warmth, “No, stay… I’d like that.”

James smiled, tentative but sure. Alex twisted his arms around and nestled into his side, the lines drawn were blurring, it was just tempting and James was there and he was warm. Alex had no chance in the end.

His fingers clutched at his shirt, his chin digging into his shoulder, his world closing in until it was just them two sat on the sofa, warm with a drunken haze around them. It felt nice, Alex thought. He liked him, really fucking liked him. He thought he’d tell him in time, and for now, this would be enough.

\--

In the end, Alex didn’t have to say a word. James got it all on his own. It was all gentle glances and soft touches. It was sex that was slow, every move careful. It was knowing what the other wanted without mention. It was everything.

The lines were redrawn, then redrawn again. James stayed over that first night, curled up together under a blanket, the guise of fucking long gone. Then it was at a club, Alex was heady and wanting; he looped his arms around James’ waist from behind, feeling the shock tense through him at first, before he relaxed and smiled, sinking into it like it was something.

James was the one to kiss him, they were over at Alex’s place, tucked away in his room, lights dim and breaths heavy. They’d had sex, they’d cleaned up, they’d kissed. James’ fingers were gentle at his chin, coaxing his face upwards to meet his, seconds were hours as he moved closer, careful and gentle.

Their lips touched, it wasn’t flames but it was warmth, it was sitting at a campfire in the winter, it was getting home when the heating was already on, it was heat and bodies and something similar to love.

Alex’s hands tugged at James, soft but demanding, pulling him closer, limbs melting together until they lay there as one. James pulled away first, fingers heavy as they brushed Alex’s hair out of his eyes. Alex looked at him, eyes meeting, and kissed him again.

Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, Alex was always tucked under James’ arm, nestled into his side like he was his home. Alex felt surrounded, warm and cared for. It made his chest feel heavy, his heart pounding as blood was replaced for emotions.

They kissed whenever they wanted, sometimes Alex snuck up on him, sliding their lips together, distracting James putting the dishwasher on, and sometimes James tugged him closer, Alex on his lap while a movie played, noses touching, gentle and soft.

James fucked him roughly when things built up, harsh touches with soft edges, skin slapping, echoing around the room. It was desperate and heady and it encompassed them. But sometimes they fucked slowly, all hazy in the mornings like time was endless, fingers gentle but demanding, pulling their bodies together.

It felt like maybe it was something, something all-encompassing and heavy. Alex thought he never wanted anything to change.

\--

It was all warmth, in the end. It was a cold morning, sometime in February, but everything felt warm.

“You know,” James started, “I think I quite like you.”

Alex sighed, his head tucked in James’ neck, “Yeah?” He snaked his arms around his waist, his head full of cotton wool, his limbs heavy and soft.

“Yeah,” James nodded, fingers down Alex’s hair, trailing down his back, touches feeling infinite. “Might even love you, really.”

It wasn’t scary, in the end. Alex was always wanting more, but when it was laid out in gentle touches, mouths pressed together, things slow when they needed but fast in between, maybe he had everything he wanted.

Alex hummed, blood thrumming in his veins, “Think I might love you too.” He pressed his mouth against his neck, feeling like he had the whole world under his fingertips.

It didn’t need to be explicit in words, it was spoken with thousands of touches, moments in between the madness, but it was perfect. Warmth surrounding their bodies like a cloud, a warmth Alex had come to recognise as love.

**Author's Note:**

> hello big soft hours over here fsjlfkfs i have a lot of feelings about the two uses of speech being like the turning points in their relationship with the first bit being alex deciding he does want more and asking james to stay and then the next being the i love yous and the repetition throughout this cos english is absolutely delicious and i am a whore for it
> 
> but i hope u all enjoyed pls comment and kudos if u wanna cos ur all lovely n i appreciate it a lot thank u xx


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